when disaster strikes

Malaysians talk louder than what they can actually do. a lot think that they are smart. usually they think they are smarter than anyone out there. they make conjectures from thin air. they think what they read on Facebook and twitter is the real thing. they believe hearsay more than facts. not many Malaysians love to read, but they act as if they have read so much.

so the flood has hit Malaysia. again. we get this every year. and every year seems worse than the last. and every year, there will be a lot of unnecessary remarks made by smart alexes.

Malaysians complain so much that it is hard to be grateful with what they have. there are the ones who need help and they complain that help arrives late. the ones who are being helped complain that there is not enough of everything. the leaders try hard to show that they are doing something. the ones who are not involved are busy making their hypotheses of why things happen. they complain that help is not enough, the government is not doing enough, the money is not channelled to the right people and so on and so forth. and they don't contribute a thing. they don't donate money, they don't volunteer, they don't even try to make things better.

i guess this will never change. Malaysians will always be Malaysians.

Tuhan, jaga dia untukku..

i looked at my son today. i couldnt help but feel this sudden sadness within. it dawned upon me that anything can happen anytime and anywhere. what if anything happened to me? what if i ever had to go and leave the world for good, would anyone look after my son and love him as much as i do? i will never know. but i pray that he will always be in safe hands..

may God protect you my son. with or without me by your side.

patients lie all the time

Being a doctor is about listening to your patients' stories attentively and reply compassionately. They cry and tell all their sob stories to you, hoping that you will be on their side. Unfortunately patients lie most of the time. And they lie to doctors with no guilt or whatsoever. They lie directly at your face thinking that truth will never be told. the lie about everything. They lie about taking their meds when they actually dont. They lie about their symptoms. They lie about being victimized when all they want is extra financial help from the government. They lie because they are scared to be seen that they dont comply or to show that things happen with no reason.

The good thing about being a doctor is that we have our nurses to do the gossipping and tell us the reality behind all the fabricated act. but knowing the truth usually happens after we have wasted hours of our life listening to made up stories(and maybe adviced something to help ease their made up agony).

so over time, doctors learn. At least i do. I have been lied to so many times that i grow to judge my patients before actually meeting them. This is crucial to ensure that i dont get thrown with mud at my face again and again.

some house officers get scolded because they are not good

so now seems to be the time where house officers in malaysia are complaining and writing in their whining and whinging to the media. absolutely repulsive. to tell you the truth, why make your job a big deal? is it really that great? well, it is great if you make people better and keep quiet about it. but once you start complaining how tired you are because your job is demanding, then i don't see how noble your job seems to be anymore. by right, doctors help to make people feel better. but we should never expect something out of it. if people appreciate what we do, well and good. but if they don't, so be it.

frankly, house officers who whine and complain too much are those who get a tougher training compared to their peers. but why does that happen? blame it on themselves. one will not get scolded if one is really good at his/her work.  if you keep making mistakes, you will surely keep being scolded. eventually, you will break and you will blame other people for your own weakness.

so to me, those who complain are the very ones who deserve to be scolded because they are not good at what they do. they need the scoldings because they keep making the same mistakes. i don't remember being humiliated or scolded till i feel like crumbling, coz i know i was good at what i did and i will continue to try to be great at it. medicine is a field that plays with people's lives and emotions. one single mistake and people can die. it is not something that we can make do with mediocrity. that explains the tough training.

stop complaining. start to be better. if you still get scolded, you are not cut out for this profession.

irresponsible men vs my perfect man

I come across so many types of people everyday. On a daily basis, i see a mininum of 50 new faces with a spectrum of personalities and their own sob sob stories. Some are happily married, while some are stuck in a cycle of domestic violence and neglect. Most of these women i see are helpless as they are uneducated and not aware of their rights as wives.

Seeing women treated unfairly by their spouses are absolutely heart wrenching. They depend so much on their men that they think they are trapped with them forever. Like there is no way out. They are left at home with a lot of kids to look after, mouths to feed, but not much incentive given to survive. Some of these women are still young in their early twenties but they already have five kids to look after. They usually end up looking twenty years older. when we suggest contraception, the husbands come up with so many religious excuses.

I wonder why some men do not know how to be responsible. They want to get married but once they have children, they forget that it takes two to make things happen. They talk to their wives as if they deserve to be treated badly. They forget that they once promised for better or for worse.

Of all men i have met, there is this one particular guy who has always been sweet to me. I couldn't find any man more polite to me than him. His words are always refined around me. He never raises his voice just to show authority. He advises me in a way that makes me adore him more. He makes me want to be a better person for him. He never does things to purposely hurt me. Never in a thousand years would i imagine him hitting me. His touch is always gentle and loving. His smile is always there to brighten up my day. I wish all men would treat their wives just like he would do to me. He makes me feel safe and secure and above all, he makes me feel beautiful inside out. He is no other than my loving hubby whom i adore so.very.much.


Although it is still early, i want to wish you a very Happy fifth anniversary. I love you more than all the love in this world..

malaysians and their idiotic slanders

A few weeks back the nation was shocked by the story of a pretty young girl whose house was broken into and she was assaulted badly on the face with a knife. Her picture in the hospital with her head wrapped with bandage and blood everywhere became viral within hours of the incident. Most were sympathetic. But being malaysians, there has to be some people who should have learned to keep their mouth shut.

During hard times like this, it is bad enough that her scarred face became viral, but having to hear some heartless rants from complete strangers who know nothing better, is definitely hurtful. Not only were they not being sympathetic, but these idiots have managed to come up with completely nonsensical slander regarding the incident. what if it happened to them instead? will hurtful rumours help them to feel better?

When our fellow malaysians become victims of a heinous crime, it is always best to send our condolences and prayer rather than add salt to injury. The last thing a victim needs is an accusation that she did that to herself.

Please, be nice. It doesnt cost you a penny to be nice.you wont know when it is your turn to hit rock bottom.

auto pilot

It is amazing how our body goes into auto pilot mode when the brain gets tired or thinks about something.

I have been in many moments where i dont even realise that i am driving. The next thing i know, i have already reached my destination. I cant even remember if i actually drive past red lights. At times, i snap out of the auto pilot mode in the middle of my journey. When this happens, i would go into some minor anxiety attack, trying to think what just happened.

Am i day dreaming too much? or am i just tired..